Work

So, just to start off, here's a little fun fact: the most common source of contention between newly-wed spouses is the division of housework and other tasks around the home (it continues through the first 5 years).

Work is actually more beneficial to a relationship, such as marriage or family, than play. All work and no play makes one ill-prepared for adult life and more self-centered because the goal in playing is to win. By focusing on play as a means of connecting with family members, parents may rob their children of the opportunity to develop good work habits. People connect more through work than play because you learn to truly love someone when you're focused on their needs rather than your own.

We should view work as a blessing, rather than a curse. Work has a greater capacity to bind families as they focus on doing something meaningful and important. Menial tasks (those that require little expertise or intense concentration) provide opportunities for children to contribute to the family in meaningful ways.

However, managing our homes like businesses, with an emphasis on being economically prudent and efficient, often results in diminishing the likelihood of strengthening families. This is because the quickest way to get things done is by spreading people out and giving out assignments. The smartest way to get things done is to have them work together. This allows them to help each other, talk, laugh, and connect.

One final note: the father sets the example for work in the home. On page 222 of Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives (Hawkins et al.), it states: " A father who assumes responsibility for a single significant daily task, such as washing dishes, and actively gathers his children to help him, is a powerful example of partnership and service within his home." I can attest to this because when I was living at home I was the most motivated to do the work my siblings and I were told to do when my dad was willing to work with us.

So, as a wrap up, if you want to draw closer together as a family, work together, don't just play together!